Lockmeupology: Happy Holidays

I'll be traveling with my family during the Christmas holiday, so I'll be taking a blogging break.

I truly wish you all a fantastic, safe and happy holidays. 

And have FUN on New Years Eve! 

and then tell me all about it (;

But before I go, I want to leave you all with these inspiring words from Grumpy Cat.

I love Grumpy Cat, possibly because I can 

relate all too well at times.

:D

And never forget...

Have a good one and see you all in January. (;

Arrow: My Guilty Pleasure

source: IMBd

ARROW is my new guilty pleasure. I don't know why because I can't seem to put my finger on it (though I really really wish I could).

(Spoilers)

This new tv series based on the comic book superhero Green Arrow is nothing we haven't seen before. Playboy billionaire (yawn) gets stranded on deserted island after ship wreck (double yawn), father was a successful business tycoon who died after the ship wreck (of course). Playboy gets rescued after 5 years and comes home a changed man but, must maintain his playboy persona while moonlighting as masked crime fighter. Oh and I almost forgot, he's still in love with ex girlfriend but things are complicated. AND her father just happens to be a cop (eyes rolls into back of skull).  Not only that but despite the obvious, no one knows who he really is and his hood always stays perfectly in place concealing his identity no matter what kind of acrobatics he's doing while shooting limitless arrows. *takes deep breath*   

So as you can see, nothing new here. And yet...why am I itching to stream the next episode as soon as it becomes available? WHY? It's so damn stereotyped and predictable! 

Well, maybe that's exactly the reason. I know what I'm getting-- an hour of Stephen Amell, mostly topless and running around shooting his arrows at bad guys. Superhero fighting crime and making the world a better place, one bad guy at a time. The premise is comforting and good will always prevail over evil. Plus, Mr. Amell is a fantastic actor for a hot blond guy and much more appealing in my opinion, than the classic comic book version with that awful mustache. 

So what am I saying? Have my preferences been reduced to eye candy and predictable story lines? Am I the same way with the books I read? The answer is, depends (the verb, not the brand name). Sometimes, I connect with the main character so much that I can over look problems with plot or a déjà vu premise. The same can be said about a slightly underdeveloped character wrapped up in a fantastic plot. But getting back to the series, I know that if it becomes too predictable, I'll end up losing interest and move onto something else despite the ridiculously hot mc. But for a clear conscience I think I'll need to tackle this question more thoroughly, and to do that I'll be forced to view a few more episodes of Arrow. Yes, most definitely.

Savory Sunday - Chocolate Breakfast Cake with Rice Milk

There is one cake recipe I risk making once every blue moon. Trouble is, I'm terrible when it comes to baking. However, when I'm not forgetting ingredients like baking power or sugar, or forgetting the damn thing in the oven, this cake is amazing. Plus, it's made with rice flour and rice milk instead of cows milk.

Making this cake is simple and simultaneously tricky. What makes it challenging is one, I've never had the recipe written down and two, when it comes to the baking phase, I end up winging it. And if you bake then you know you never "wing" anything. 

Here are the ingredients: (Remember, I've never had the exact measurements because I never bothered writing them down. Therefore, I use a tall glass for measuring: 1 part  = one large glass. Just respect the proportions and it'll be fine.)

3 to 4 eggs depending on size
1 part raw sugar 
1 part coconut shavings
2 parts rice flour
2 parts rice milk
100 g of dark chocolate
1 small packet of baking powder
pinch of salt (fleur de sel if you have it)

Preheat oven.
Melt the chocolate in the rice milk. In a large bowl, mix the rest of the ingredients together. Pour the chocolate and rice milk mix in with the rest of the ingredients. Mix well. Pour the whole lot into a cake mold and stick it in the oven. This is where things get tricky. I'm not sure exactly how long it should cook. What I do is stick it in the oven for about 20 minutes. Sometimes I lower the temperature a few degrees, don't ask me why I do that because sometimes I forget and it doesn't seem to change things much.

God, Elise. These are the worst directions ever for making a cake.
Give me a break. I'm a pantser even in the kitchen and this cake is fab...Granted, when I'm not screwing it up.  

So after about 20 minutes, I'll stab the cake with a knife to check if it's cooked. If it looks done, I'll turn off the oven, pull out the cake and let it cool before de-molding. Actually, that's a big fat lie. I turn off the oven and leave it in there until I can get back to it later. Nine out of ten times it comes out burned on top, but it's still damn good cake.

A few things to keep in mind. If you're used to highly sweeten cakes, you probably won't care much for this. But, I guess you could always add more sugar. And though it's a moist cake (sorry for you folks that cringe at the word moist), it's not your typical light, airy, fluffy kiddie cake. It's dense. Really dense, the black hole of cakes kind of dense. One descent slice for breakfast with coffee or tea should do. Also, it's a nice substitute for all you poor lactose intolerant people out there, or those who simply want to reduce your dairy intake.

Okay, that's it for today. Enjoy your Sunday and Bon Appétit! 

Savory Sunday: Beer and Chocolate

We had friends over for dinner last week and for l'apéro, I thought it'd be fun to do a little beer tasting. Back in college, I came to appreciate all kinds of beers and really miss the microbreweries of the States. Unfortunately, since I moved to France, I haven't had a lot of opportunity to drink beer. As a consequence, I know very little about European beers. Anyway, I thought I'd go out and grab some random bottles at our local beer store (which is huge btw) to sample with friends. This is what I ended up with:  

My favorites were the first two on the left and the last on the right .

Abbaye des Rocs a dark Belgium beer (9 %), Tripel Karmeliet (8.4%) a Belgium light beer that claims their 3 grain beer recipe dates back to the 17th century in the Carmes de Termonde monastery. And lastely, Chimay (9%) another Belgium dark beer  brewed by Trappist monks of the Abbaye de Scourmont.  

The Quintine (8%) was a light beer and the only reason I got it is because I like the label. Serves me right, it really does taste like witches brew. The Timmermans (4.5%) was a bit too aggressive to my liking as far as taste, and the Goliath (9%) was so strong  I ended up watering the weeds with what was left in my glass. 

If anyone has any suggestions I should try let me know. Got any favorites?

And for you non-alcoholic / chocolate fans, here's something really simple to make and an instant smile generator no matter what time of year. Make hot chocolate and use a tooth pic to skewer two marshmallows and pinch them to the edge of your mug. See, you're smiling already. (:

My kids love this. Even in the summer, it's a hit.

I for Isoptera: Termites!

Fun Facts

1) Termites belong to the order Isoptera which means equal wings (equal in lenght).

2) Termites are eusocial insects. A colony divides the labor among castes, produce overlapping generations, and take care of young collectively.

3) Termites feed on cellulose, the main component of palnt cell walls and the most common organic compound on Earth. It can be found in dead plant material generally in the form of wood, leaf litter, soil and/or animal dung. 

4 ) Cellulose in a termite's food is digested by myriads of microoganisms (ooooo, ahhhhhhh) living in the termite's digestive tract. An excellent example of symbiosis !!! Woot Woot and the crowd goes wild!!! But, that also means they can cause serious structural damage to buildings, crops or plantation forests. In the southwestern United States, termite damage is estimated to $1.5 billion each year in wood structure damage (source: Wikipedia). 

5) Depending on the species, termite nests can be entirely subterranean or may protrude above the surface as mounds, some reaching 9 meters tall (30 feet) !!!

6) Termites use mud tubes to travel above ground. The tubes provide protection from predators and prevent water loss due to open air. 

7) It is estimated that certain termite queens can produce up to 30,000 eggs/ DAY! (O_O)

Below is a flash fiction piece (~350 words ) I wrote this morning. The idea came to me last night at 2 am :/ I don't ever write in this tense and it shows but nevertheless, I wanted to take a stab at it.

------

I sit in the middle of the table, cross-legged. My eyes seduced by the overhead light source.

Flash, flash, flash.

The hallucinations begin.

A parade of psychedelic colors enters my visual field. They swirl in front of me, breathtaking in their juxtaposition. They look soft and warm. I reach out to catch the blue one. It’s quick. I giggle.

Flash, flash, flash.

They vanish.

Now I’m hot. I tug at my robes then my body snaps back. I fall from the edge and hit the ground but feel no pain. I try to get up but my body, rigor mortis-like, does not comply.

“They’re eating my brain,” I say. "I can feel them in my head. Feasting." My voice escalates, my heart starts drumming, my anxiety is climbing.

“Shut up Batskin. No one is eating your brain,” says a voice outside my view.

I wait for my body to melt and then sit up. Clovis is sitting on the couch, the stripes across is right arm show rank. His spoken words are suspended in a green bubble above his head. I’m not comforted knowing he’s here. They’re probably eating his brain too.

Flash, flash, flash.

A small visitor enters the room. It wears a bronze galea on its head. I’ve seen it before; it’s from the OmegaArc 90 sector. It needs to know.

“They’re eating my brain and they’ll eat yours too,” I warn.

“What the hell is he tripping on Clovis?” says the visitor.

“Schizomethtral.” I watch the word trail out of Clovis’s moth. The letters are dancing but he does not see them.

“Crap, Clovis. You know he can’t handle anything from the Craters.”

“I only gave him one hair.”

The visitor approaches me. It’s huge now, a towering figure above me. It looks angelic. Maybe it’s not from OmegaArc 90. Maybe it’s an angel from the Vega moon. My mind wonders, I can’t stop staring at its beauty. “If his eyes dilate any wider, I’m taking him to the medical compound.”

So many words crowd the room. I watch them mix together forming new sentences, mostly gibberish.

“Whatever man. Take him and get out. Both of you are killing my ride.”

 “They’re eating my brain,” I whisper again.

“Calm down Batskin. No zombies here.”

Zombies? It thinks of zombies but it’s wrong!  

I feel a tingle in my sinus, a tickle in my nasal cavity that causes me to sneeze. Something is forced out of my nose. It drops to my hand. Its a small white creature no larger than the lashes on my face.

“What the hell is that?” says the towering figure in front of me.

It sees it too. I am relieved. “Termites from the planet Earth. I told you, they’re eating my brain and they’ll eat yours too.”

-----

IMPORTANT: Just so we're clear about this, the above excerpt is a work of fiction. Termites do NOT eat brains! Unless, your brain is made of wood.